1. I hate that you require SO much attention. Minutes here and there really add up and that’s time I could be spending with family, or shopping, or at the dentist. Because really, I think I would rather visit the dentist every day if it meant living without YOU.
2. I hate that you stole the last sliver of kid left within me and pushed me full force into adulthood at a far too early age.
3. I hate that you have such an impact on my husband and I’s decision to have a family and I hate that you will be so much a part of that process.
4. I hate that you occupy so, so much of my mind. I wish I could just shut you off and shut you up but that would only mean harder times for myself.
5. I hate that you cost me money – and I’m not just talking about a few bucks here and there. You cost me so much that I don’t even want to add it all up for fears that I might want to spend it all on something else (like central air conditioning for the house or a fancy vacation somewhere).
6. I hate the hurt you cause me. You hurt my fingers, my stomach, my eyes, my heart, my kidneys and pretty much every other organ and body part.
7. I hate that you cause the people that love me to worry about me. I’m responsible and independent but no matter how well I care for myself, they will always have cause for concern with you around.
8. I hate that you’ve stolen a bit of my independence. I know I can do many things but many ignorant people think I cannot and will judge me for being burdened by you – and the world is full of ignorant people.
9. I hate you for keeping me from being a pilot. It doesn’t really matter that I’ve never actually wanted to be a pilot, I just hate that you would keep me from realizing that dream (if it were my dream).
10. I hate that I will be thinking of you ever moment, of every day and night, for the rest of my life. You don’t deserve to be looked after so well but I forever will.
But, Dee, as much as I hate you and everything about you, I am thankful that you choose my body to reside in. Because, if given the choice between watching those I love go through this or living through it myself, I choose me a million times over.
This post is part of the Second Annual Diabetes Blog Week